How To Feel More Confident In Your 30s

In our 30s, we can feel like we’re meant to have our lives together and feel good about ourselves, after letting go of the worries from our teens and 20s. Unfortunately, this is now always the case. Lots of things can cause a drop in self-esteem in your 30s, whether you’re a nervous new Mom, are having a confidence wobble at work, or are struggling with the idea of aging. Here’s how you can build some confidence in your 30s. 

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Watch Your Social Media Use

Social media can batter your self-confidence, even if you think you’re old enough to know better. For mothers, seeing other parents on Instagram who seem to have everything together, while raising angelic children. If you’re a career girl, you might be comparing yourself to women who have started three side hustles and been made CEO of their company before the age of 35. 

If your social media is making you feel bad, change your habits. Unfollow anyone who makes you feel bad about yourself, and instead fill your feeds with people more like you, or people that you find inspiring. Or better yet, deactivate your accounts for a while and take a breather from social media altogether.

Don’t Feel Bad For Wanting To Change

If you are considering a big change to help you feel more confident, like weight loss or cosmetic surgery, if you believe it will genuinely help, don’t let anyone guilt you about it. Loving yourself as you are might be trendy, but if you can change something about yourself that makes you miserable, it could be worth doing. 

If you are considering this, make sure it will actually make you happier. Do proper research, such as looking into posts like ‘Top 5 Breast Augmentation Myths’, and make sure you are making this choice for the right reasons, not to please someone else. 

Ban Negative Talk

Lots of us talk down about ourselves, and we often express this to our friends too. Think about the last time you saw your girlfriends. How much of the conversation was about feeling “too fat”, looking bad in a dress or not being a good enough friend/worker/parent? Probably quite a lot. 

Don’t engage in this kind of talk, as it only makes you feel worse. By vocalizing these negative things about yourself, you’re solidifying the idea that there is something wrong with you. If your friends engage in this kind of talk a lot and you find it difficult, tell them. Ask them politely to please not talk this way around you, and explain that you find it triggering and upsetting. 

Instead, suggest you talk about other things and complement each other instead of insulting yourselves. A genuine compliment from a friend can make you feel great, and many people find that giving compliments to others makes you feel better too.

Don’t save your compliments for your friends either. If that woman you see at work in the lift has a great eyeliner game, tell her! You’ll make her day, and make yourself feel good too for being nice to someone else.