College, Kids, Parenting

Helping Your Child Through College, From Afar

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Your child leaving for college is supposed to signal the moment they leave the motherly protection of your parental wing and take flight on their first step into the real world. But that in of itself can be hard to do at first, the house seems emptier and quieter, and there will be nights you sit up fretting whether your little scholar is having fun, making friends, and getting on with their work.

Because college is supposed to represent newfound independence for your child, you want to make sure that there is no more coddling. If you want them to become their own person, you need to let them grow. But there are still things you can do, from afar, to help support them through their highs and their lows.

BE SUPPORTIVE

Kids, and teenagers, in particular, want to rebel. They won’t want to do everything you tell them, and as your child approaches adulthood, they might very well want to have experiences that you never did, and that’s okay. It is essential for them to find their own way of life.

But for all of this independence, there will come a time where they need you. College students are prone to making mistakes, and it’s crucial to support your child no matter what. With this first taste of freedom, it can be easy for them to stray from the goal, especially in their first year. This could be needing extra cash for the frat party, or perhaps help in getting out of trouble. Click for more information on how to help your child who has found themselves in a bit of bother.

BE AVAILABLE

College students operate on a different schedule to the rest of the world. Some will sleep until noon; others will still be awake from the night before. But for all the fun they might be having (in between working super hard, of course), missing home is only natural, especially if it is their first time away.

Being available, no matter what time of day (or night), can have a massive positive effect on your faraway future genius. While they will probably find their own supportive circle of friends around campus, the comforts of home help like no other. Be warned, though, hearing their voice for the first time in a month may make you realize how much you miss them.

KEEP YOUR DISTANCE

While is it important for you to be there when you’re needed, it is also important to know when you’re not. Your child is never going to grow into a strong, independent member of society if you’re always bombarding them with questions about assignment deadlines, studying schedules and whether or not they’re eating their vegetables.

What parents of college students need to know is that these students are still young, and therefore still trying to figure out who they are. They attended college not only for a degree, but to also grow as people and find their path in life. Not allowing them to do this can result in disastrous results, and will make all their hard work for nothing.

 

College isn’t for everyone, but it isn’t up to you to decide whether it is or isn’t for your child, they can only make that decision for themselves. What you can decide, though, is how active, supportive, and involved you are in your child’s college career, all with the aim of helping them succeed. 

Disclosure: This is a contributed post.

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2 Comments

2 Comments

  1. Eileen Richter
    December 7, 2017 at 1:47 am

    The Keep your distance is very hard. I have one that is almost half way and another who will be heading off next fall. My older kids didnt attend right out of high school so it’s hard to see them off when just 18

  2. 7 Unhelpful Things You Should Never Say To Your Teenage Child - Candid Mama
    February 13, 2018 at 12:50 pm

    […] It can be difficult to watch your child leave home, and cutting the ties will hurt. Still, you can help them from afar, despite the understandable worries you will go through. So, don’t put a guilt trip on them. […]

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